Because I can't be arsed to come up with an idea and because it's the single least popular part of the entire site... and to use the term popular is frankly an insult to the dictionary... here's another fucking poem. As usual... words... until bored... or... can't think of anything for over a minute...

Don't worry... I got bored quickly... and... promise... never... to do this again.

Another pointless rhyme,
Wallowing in household grime,
As ashtray apocalypse roars ever on,
Thermostat quite fucked, soon be gone.

It’s fucking cold, window open,
Not sure if my knees are copin’
Hats explode with fearsome roar,
Codpiece bloodbomb full of gore.

Extend your legs in upwards motion,
Smear your ears with non-fat lotion,
Run face first into a hollow wall,
Cavity insulation has its thrall.

It would be nice to smoke some crack,
Rather new to this but I’ll get the knack,
Not entirely sure how to buy it,
What if it tastes a bit like shit?

No, on second thoughts I’ll try meditation,
Probably more effective than the medication,
I suspect my doctor might be flawed,
He gave me bricks that must be poured.

Touch my face, feel the grain,
Like a plank of wood, try again,
This time I used my manly jaw,
Stroke again you monkey whore.

If I could ride a big boy bike,
I’d journey miles as I like,
I’d pedal hard and steer quite well,
My bike seat would entrance with smell.

Pinecone coffee, mushroom mocha,
Cardboard Danish, marzipan knocker,
I wish to strangle you Starbucks man,
Burn your apron, kick your flan.

I’m pretty sure there is no point at all,
In making judgements large or small,
I tried to treat a recent wound,
My decision? In salt was spooned.

I tried to fight a cat made of cheese,
I took its eyes out with my keys,
He tried to fight, to get revenge,
I crushed him beneath my Henge.

Mother mouse came to me,
Rubbed with jam, wet with gee,
I asked him why she would do this thing,
She said it meant I was now king.

Hack-sawing through a lemon tart,
I dug my way into Mr. Kippling’s heart,
He resisted using his evil ways,
I took off his legs with deathly rays.

Fight the power is a stupid phrase,
A phrase the average hippy says,
I decided I wouldn’t shout this,
Instead I douse them with my piss.

It’s not mature, it’s not effective,
But the unwashed are defective,
I don’t want your mango tea,
There is fuck all wrong with me.

The people with those fancy phones,
Are just as likely to gnaw my bones,
Obnoxious fuckflowers grown in shite,
A Sherman tank would ease my plight.

If you took a tiny rubber horse,
And gave it to the ancient norse,
They would look at it with awe,
To modern eyes, it is quite poor.

Decorating on a limited budget?
There’s no need to merely fudge it,
Open your home to a smelly tramp,
Give him a torch and thus… a lamp

Expand your mind and free your sock,
Build a house just for a squirrel’s cock,
If your life has reached this point,
The result will likely disappoint.

Make a camel made of butter,
Only do this if you’re a nutter,
A terrible mess will be always made,
Much like an explosive marinade.

It’s all quite pointless at this stage,
Technical failings revealed by age,
Going bald, getting fat,
Get the droop, look a twat.

Your family will leave you in a home,
And you’ll sit like a fucking gnome,
Battery-free remote control,
Be it cancer? Be it mole?